Gooden Blog

Whether your family celebrates a faith-based holiday or not, these weeks at the end of the year are for setting aside time for family and family traditions. They provide teaching moments within homes and families and cannot be discounted. Gooden has many traditions, and all are intended to build connections between and within families. Movie night, seasonal teas, promotion and graduation ceremonies, Grandparents’ and Special Friends’ Day, and of course Lessons & Carols, are traditions that bring us together as a community and strengthen our connections with one another. 

Community and connection underpin Gooden’s 3Rs, and our traditions help students understand that they do not live in a vacuum and that they are connected to all people in all other periods of time, both those that preceded them and those that will come after. They understand that they are part of something larger than themselves, and it is during the holidays that their unique cultural traditions have the greatest potential to help in this process of self-definition, to contribute to their well-being, and to cultivate an all-important sense of belonging and a healthy perspective of their place in the world.

We desperately need our traditions. Part of the responsibility of having the chance to live at all is to be a part of the transmission of our particular family and ethnic customs. In so doing, we honor past generations by passing on their rites and rituals to the next generation. In this way, our family lineages stay stable and strong. Since ceremonies outlive us, they make us feel part of that larger sense of things as we pass them down to our own children, and theirs. That is how we realize our immortality, not in living forever, but in being part of living traditions.

It may be weddings, Sunday football, Halloween, religious holidays, birthdays, anniversaries, or graduations — there is little that is not tradition. Yet, while we hold old traditions dear, we should also not ignore new ways of looking at things in the name of keeping traditions alive that may have become outlived or outdated. For example, as a child, I helped my grandmothers make Christmas cakes every year even though I hated Christmas cake and the smell of the brandy and mold as they aged in root cellars. I hated the product - and today not many people eat these cakes -  but as I got older, I realized that the product was not the point: it was the tradition of spending time with my grandmothers that mattered and that I treasured. Traditions can and should change, and so we must be all the while open to the creation of new ones.

On December 19 the entire student body will participate in a chapel service of Lessons & Carols, held at St. Rita Church (one block north of Gooden). In the early weeks of December, the student body prepares by practicing for this 43-year school tradition adapted from a long-standing Anglican service.  Some students will present the story from the angels’ perspective, while others will portray members of the holy family or shepherds and kings who were drawn to the humble manger scene. Of all the school’s traditions, Lessons &Carols is the most dearly held tradition for many students and alumni. For some students, it is the memory of being in first, second, or third grade and reciting the words of Saint Luke, who told of the birth of Jesus. For others, it may be the memory of a solemn journey down the church aisle as fourth-grade students dressed as Mary, Joseph, or one of the magi. When we are very lucky, a real baby joins us as baby Jesus. Participation in this special evening provides each child with a collection of meaningful memories that remains for years.

On behalf of everyone at The Gooden School, I wish you and your family a very happy holiday season and a happy New Year.

Jo-Anne Woolner is the head of school at Gooden.  She has served the school as interim head of school, director of the Middle School, registrar, and teacher of English, social studies, and Latin after originally joining the school community as a parent of four Gooden students. She received her Bachelor of Arts/Science in English from the University of Calgary (Canada) and Master of Arts in medieval history and languages and Master of Philosophy in Catholic Church history from New York University. In addition to teaching at NYU before moving to California, she has been a presenter at regional independent school conferences and has been a volunteer and board member at several community-based nonprofits in Pasadena.