Gooden Blog

When Chaplain David finds himself in a room full of people who don’t know each other very well, he has a simple way of getting conversation going. He offers a neutral topic and invites everyone to share a one-sentence response. It might be something like “something that makes you smile,” “your first driving experience,” or even “tater tots.” It’s a small exercise he picked up years ago while leading communication workshops, and it still works every time.

Recently, at a Chamber of Commerce gathering in another town, he was seated with a group of civic leaders of all ages. After some initial conversation, he introduced the exercise. They went around the table a couple of times, and then he offered a prompt that always changes the tone of the room: “middle school.”

For more than twenty years, he has used that prompt, and the pattern is almost always the same. Out of ten people, maybe one will share something positive. Most responses lean negative, sometimes strongly so, while a smaller group is just sort of indifferent. When he follows up and asks if anyone has ever gone back to visit their middle school, nearly everyone says no. Often, the reaction is more like, “Why would I?”

It’s not surprising. Middle school has a reputation. For many, it’s remembered as one of the most difficult times growing up.

And yet, something very different happens here at Gooden.

Every year, our students come back.

Not because they have to, and not just because they are picking up a younger sibling. They come back on their own to visit teachers, to stop by classrooms, to see younger students they once mentored, and to walk around campus remembering. This happens with students who were here for many years and with those who joined us for a shorter time. It even happened during the pandemic. Before and after lockdowns, students still made the effort to return.

They come back to their middle school.

That says something. In a time of life that is often described as awkward or difficult, our students leave with something different. They leave feeling known, supported, and connected. That is what we think of as the Gooden “secret sauce.” It’s not one single thing, but a combination of relationships, care, and a community that takes middle school seriously in all the right ways.

And you can see the impact of that as our students take their next steps.

We are genuinely proud of this year’s 8th-grade class. They were accepted to multiple high schools, and most are heading to one of their top choices. That is no small thing. They earned spots at an impressive range of schools, including La Salle High School, Flintridge Sacred Heart Academy, St. Francis High School, Westridge, California School of the Arts, Flintridge Preparatory School, EF Academy, Don Bosco Tech, Mayfield Senior School, Maranatha High School, Sequoyah School, Waverly School, and Campbell Hall. Many of them were also awarded merit scholarships, which speaks to both their accomplishments and who they are as students.

We celebrate where they are going, but we also recognize what got them there. Their success reflects years of growth, encouragement, and the kind of middle school experience that builds both confidence and character.

So the next time you’re in a group and want to get people talking, try bringing up “middle school.” Listen to what people say. Then ask if anyone would ever go back to visit.

If there’s a Gooden graduate in the room, there’s a good chance the answer will be yes.